We seek out relationship in order to feel connected, stimulated, safe, loved and fulfilled. However, with each of our unique histories of interpersonal wounding, trauma and systemic oppression, intimate relationships often become the site of rewounding, disappointment, resentment and disconnection. Actually, this is normal! And it doesn't have to be the end of your story. Couples therapy is designed to unpack, rework and heal the wounds between you and to revitalize the connection, excitement and love that brought you together in the first place.
Our earliest and deepest wounds occurred in the context of connection, or in the absence of connection that was needed. Whether with parents, caregivers, siblings or peers, our interactions with the world outside our skin deeply affects our internal world and how we relate to our spouse or partner. Intimate relationships offer us the opportunity to explore, heal and grow the most vulnerable and amazing parts of ourselves. Couples therapy can guide and support this process.
I am in ongoing consultation and training to ensure I ongoing guidance and support around couples and relationship work. I completed a year long training in the Developmental Model of couples therapy, a modality that incorporates the growth and development of each individual as well as the couple. My work is also influenced by Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, Gottmann Therapy and Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy.
“Love rests on two pillars: surrender and autonomy. Our need for togetherness exists alongside our need for separateness.”
Esther Perel on Infidelity
I work with many individuals and couples healing from trauma. My approach is grounded in current neuroscientific research about how trauma is processed in the brain, particularly the unconscious and somatic dimensions of trauma. I work to facilitate awareness, both within and between you, of feelings and bodily sensations connected to trauma triggers and memories. Together, we will explore how these memories and nonverbal somatic states play out in your relationship.
I work with couples healing from infidelity and wounding of all kinds. I work with couples from all walks of life, including queer, non-monogamous, age-gap and cross-cultural relationships. Our work together will involve learning about and honoring what is unique and incredible about your relationship while also contextualizing your stress and struggles with an understanding of the negative impact of trauma, oppression, stigma and dominant cultural values.